The following items are necessary for game play: Either a spot amongst all the other graduates or a ticket for the audience. Robe, cap, and all the other paraphernalia (if a graduation candidate). A lot of beer.

Take a drink whenever a speaker uses the words:

  - bright future         - budgeting time        - debt (see also below)
  - deserving             - drinking              - endurance
  - faculty               - finally / at last     - fond memories
  - fraternity            - friendship            - future
  - hard work             - honor                 - interest, -ing
  - job                   - knowledge             - late nights/all-nighters
  - love of learning      - party                 - perseverance
  - preparation           - sacrifice             - sorority
  - study/studies         - support               - tuition
  - vision                - volunteer             - work

Take three drinks when someone quotes:

• Lydia Moss Bradley
• Martin A. "Party Marty" Abegg
• Any other former president of the university
• Any of our country's Founding Fathers
• A current rock hit

Slam one whenever a speaker:

• Mentions the "great debt we/you owe our/your parents."
• Makes a cute remark about the length of time it takes to graduate nowadays (eg., "your six or seven years here"), (slam and a half if that person has been out of college for more than two years)
• Makes a cute remark about how hard it is to find a job right now (slam and a half if that person gets paid simply to be important).
• Makes a serious remark about how hard it is to find a job right now.
• Mentions how many National Merit Scholars there are in this graduating class.
• Mentions any of the different surveys that rank colleges and universities.
• Implies that college in general, and your institution in particular, is still affordable.

Slam two whenever a speaker:

• Implicitly or explicitly implies that the number of National Merit Scholars in this class is a measure of the quality of education this class received at your institution.
• Whenever a speaker makes a comment that is completely meaningless and obviously intended only to draw laughs, drink until the laughter dies out.
• Whenever a graduate's friends and relatives are tacky enough to cheer/yell/etc. when their name is read, drink until they stop.
• Drink until you lose it whenever a speaker quotes the Grateful Dead.

When in doubt, drink.